Sunday, April 30, 2006

We have a plan to regain public support for my administration.



hi... if you are readin my thots every day then you no i am the great victery commander who is givin freedom to all the opresed people of the hole world be cause of a plan that the little god in my hart told me.

well... did you no there are some peopl who dont think i am doin a real good job... they think i am screwin up everythin and i am about the worst presidint ever... and some of em even think i am nuts.

well we have bin havin a lot of meetins here in the wite house about what is wrong with those people. and we have figgered out that we are just not comunicatin good enuf and we have to comunicate our selfs better... and we come up with a plan to fix it and it is a real good plan.

and it is two things... one is we are gonna forge real close relashin ships with the reporters who tell the truth about stuff and glorify Me. and the other reporters are gonna get arested for bein spys for the enimy. and after we arest them we will give it a couple months and if the comunicashins dont get better then we will arest more. and then every one will no who is the victery commander around here...

bye for now

Sunday, April 16, 2006

Donald Rumsfeld has my total and complete confidence.



hi... sorry about the no thots in a while but we are workin real hard on the iran attack plans... and it is gonna go real good... don rumsfeld has tole me that all we need is two or three thousand troops to take over iran... if we are not afraid of winnin dirty.... and i said that is the best way to win... ha ha ha

now a lot of peopole... think that i shouold fire don rumsfeld... be cause we are losin the war and it is his responsiblity to win it. now i disagree w ith that. be cause no one new that this was gonna happen... and any way things are gettin real better over there all the time. so just shut up....

any way he is out at camp david with me this week end.... and i tole him he had my full support and he would be my secritary of defence for a real long time. and he started to cry and he grabbed a bottle and smashed it on the table and he starting stabbin him self in the neck with it... and he was screamin that i am a in human monster... and i laffed and laffed he is a real big joker around here... helps break up the tenshin of a real busy day....

bye for now.

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

There has been a lot of wild speculation about Iran.

hi... you kno there sure has bin a lot of speculatin about my plans fer iran... and peopl wanna know if we are gonna attak them and use nucular wepins on them.

well... i aint sayin... cause it is a secrit... but wen the elecshin time is hear people are not gonna be talkin about iraq any more... they are gonna be talkin about iran and how i gave them freedom too... and if we have to use the nucular wepins... well... why do you think we have those wepins... freedom is gods gift to the world and god wants me to give it to all the world... and i have still got a lot of time left as the victery comander to distroy all the tirany in the world... an i will too.

bye for now

Friday, April 07, 2006

My Health Savings Accounts are the medicine America needs.




hi... you no i have bin goin around the contry havin conversashinis about my plan for helth savins acouonts and it is my main domestic prioority rite now so i bet you are all talkin about it and want to no more... and why it is a real good idea.

well... you see the helth problem that we have in this contry is... that people are gettin too much helth care... for stuff they dont really need and it is gettin to be real expensive for the system.

so my plan is you pay for yoor own dam helth care with your own dam money... and that way you will quit buyin too much. so if the doctor says you need an operashin... like if you have canser or somethin and it will cost 50 thousin dollers to fix... an you dont have the money you can say no way docter i will just have the canser. so you see it is a real good plan.

bye for now

ps this thing about the leak is some bull shit... we had to stop that god dam traiter wilson from attackin our war support.. and i tole dick cheney he can do what ever he wants to dis credit wilson... and that is all what is the god dam big deal. bye

Saturday, April 01, 2006

There will be many changes in my Administration.

hi you no i have got a lot of anousemints to make for today.. and one is that we are pullin out of iraq startin monday...

an from now in there is gonna be acount ability in my administrashin... so when somebody screws up real bad they are gonna get fired... and i will not tolerate incompitinse...

an from now on i am gonna follow all the laws and stuff... and the treaties too. an any body in my administrashin that has commited crimes are gonna be turned over to the police... heh heh...

and i am gonna shut down all the interrigashin centers we have aroun the world and turn em all loose... and from now on we are not gonna capsher a guy unless we have some prooof that he did somethin.

and i just submited a balinsed budgit to the congress... heh heh heh... and we are gonna re bild new orleens too...

shit i love april fools day